Less of the eye rolling thank you!

In yesterday's post I mentioned menopause. I did this without realising I'd scheduled it for International Men's Day 🤦🏻‍♂️

Which might mean that I am guilty of being the Internet's current favourite meme target: the performative male. Or, it might signal that I/we don't take men's issues quite as seriously as we should.

So, while I grab a matcha, clutch my labubu and copy of The Second Sex, I turn my attention to whether there is, or isn't such a thing as the manopause?

Which is a surprisingly controversial idea in popular culture. Probably because of the Internet's capacity to remove empathy from just about every conversation. In short, shouty people of the Twittersphere think that if we were to discuss men's issues in the middle part of life, that means we are ignoring women's issues in the middle part of life.

But that's not my experience of actual humans.

Actual humans are capable of extending empathy in multiple directions. Particularly I should say, the kind of intelligent, cultured and rounded humans who subscribe to this newsletter.

And so, I am here to say that there IS a thing we might call the manopause, but more correctly call the andropause, which is "a condition associated with a decline in testosterone in aging men, leading to symptoms like decreased libido, fatigue, erectile dysfunction, mood changes, and reduced muscle mass."

Let's just pick two of those: fatigue and mood changes. They seem to happen to men much more gradually and with less fluctuation the women experience in (peri)menopause, but for many men the symptoms are very really but rarely recognised.

An so, just at the time when the demands on men in modern society tend to peak, biology sends us tiredness and low mood. But society also tends to say, "man up" and "yeah, but, the patriarchy". Or we give a little side-eye and talk about a "midlife crisis". Be honest. We all do that a bit, right?

But, not on my watch. With many of the men I coach, we talk about these issues. Not always directly. Often about the effects they cause. Which leads us to talk about really good strategies to limit decline in this season of life.

And with many of the women I coach, we talk about these issues. Because they care about the men in their lives.

Which is why this is one of the topics we will be talking about in my workshop on December 2nd.

So, if it would benefit you (or someone you know) to understand more about the issues that impact us all in the middle part of life, grab a seat. This one is only happening live. So, be there ... or don't.

Stephen

PS I don't have a labubu.

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